Virginia Beach 10K!

Taylor,
This post is for you, my dear! Running your first 10k as I write is amazing & we're proud of you! You can do it! You've trained & prepared & you're ready!

All of us who know you, know your heart & will is what will get you through! Your hubby is cheering (I can hear him from here!!!) He's just as proud as can be of your determination to do this!

Not all 10k's are created equal in matters of the heart & mind. You, sweet daughter, get it done every day! Sure, we're proud of the run, but way more than that, proud of who you are & how you're living!

Go the distance & finish strong!

Blessings!
-Mom

The Equalizer

It's been said that cancer is the great equalizer. No matter the color of skin, size of paycheck or number of candles on the birthday cake, cancer's not discerning of the next body it attacks. Because of this "equalizing", emotional walls we've built come crumbling down with others who are in the same "cancer boat." I've found that one of the most wide open doors to another person's heart is in a doctor's waiting room, lab or hospital. Maybe I was catching them just before hearing results of a scan, post-surgery, infusion or labs. If my eyes & ears were open to another, emotions would flow from their hearts, to me, a stranger!

I learned from the Lord thru this year to really, really watch & listen to people He put before me. I was sure if I listened to Him, I could be encouraging to other patients as they faced their illnesses. Sure enough, as I was waiting in the ladies' locker room for radiation one day, a lady came in I'd not seen before. She was in her early 50's, about 5 feet tall & very thin. Her face was weathered & worn & her ponytail was windblown from the motorcycle ride she'd made into treatment.

She & I looked different outwardly but shared something far more intimate than outward appearance. We shared cancer. As we sat in that ladies' locker room awaiting radiation, it really didn't matter who we were, where we came from or what we did for a living. It didn't matter how much money we made, who our parents were or what college we attended. We were just two ladies whose lives collided one day.

There is no time to lose in those waiting rooms. There's an acute awareness of time & people & illness. I found out very quickly she had colon cancer. After saying our hello's & determining the kinds of cancer we each had, she stood up & opened her hospital gown to me, revealing her bare, scarred up body. Besides chemo & radiation, she'd had had 24 surgeries in 3 & a half years! Her torso looked like a battle field! It was really unbelievable & incredibly humbling for me to witness such openess from a person I'd not met until moments earlier! For as hard as my journey's been this year, I felt it mild in comparison to her's!

The first thing I did was thank her for trusting me enough to show me her body & scars. As she closed up her gown, I asked her if she knew Jesus. She not only knew Him, but loved & followed Him! She was walking every step of her cancer journey with God & discussed Him openly. She was a strong believer & we had a immediate bond. We had two bonds, actually. The cancer bond & the Lord. The person I thought I'd be encouraging flipped that around in a heartbeat. She lifted my spirits with her great attitude & love for God. Her smile reminded me that God loves all of us. He cares about all people of all colors & walks of life. He saves in all economies.

Ever imagine how colorful heaven will be? I mean all the different people there? I can say with my whole heart, there will be a tattooed, weathered lady I will look up when I get there! She won't be sick anymore & we'll praise our God forever- together- when we have all the time in the world!

Yes, cancer is a great equalizer but it doesn't compare to God's love!

Blessings!

Status Update

Another note to say, "Thank-you!" for the continued prayer & love support that's generously given to my family & me! Love is an amazing thing to watch in action! You are an amazing people & we are blessed, blessed, blessed!

Radiation was complete mid-September, so now is the time for healing & strength to be renewed. I'm one month into the 6 month "cooling" from radiation & am doing well. The radiation burn is healing nicely & I continue to care for the skin that took the treatment. Radiation damages cancer cells to slow or nullify their ability to reproduce, so it's a tough treatment, for sure! It damages the good cells, too, since it can't differentiate between the two, so it takes the body working hard to recover. That's what this time if for, so I'm doing my best to listen to my body & live a slower pace than I used to.

My heart is much more in tune these days to people who have or have had health issues. Just saw a good friend who had heart surgery months ago, & she's still hurting & dealing with pain & health issues. She looks great & is healing- but that's what I understand now- she's in a long process. Not restored physically as instantly as we tend to want. The body needs time after trauma & we're ones who want it now! Sometimes God brings healing miraculously & sometimes He brings it through medicine & time. Waiting on Him can be difficult & it can also be a great blessing! I'm learning to wait & be patient & listen & trust. I'm also learning to be more tender to others. I pray my heart is incredibly tender to the suffering of others for the rest of my days & not rushing them out of God's timing for my sake or my agenda.

God is still good everyday, all the time! He shows Himself in the most amazing ways & it will be really, really fun in heaven to understand completely just how He worked out all our journeys for our good & entertwined our lives! It's gonna be great to see Him face to face, isn't it? For now, we get to live covered up by His blessings, & eventhough our understanding is limited, we can know we are loved beyond measure!

Blessings!

That's Too Long!

Years ago there was a Wolf Brand Chili TV commercial that went something like, "How long has it been since you've a hot, steamin' bowl of Wolf Brand Chili?"... the answer came in, "Well, that's too long!" I got to thinking about that catchy TV ad during a recent roadtrip & began to ask myself how long it's been since I've seen God in the day to day events & moments of my life. How long has it been since I've noticed Him & paid attention to His presence? How long has it been that I really looked for Him? When was the last time I heard Him say- for certain- that He loves me all the time? ... "Well, that's too long!"

"How long has it been since I've seen God in the day to day events of life?" To get the answer, I ask myself how long it's been since I've held a sleeping baby, played with a puppy, or watched the sun rise? When was the last time I witnessed the colors of the leaves changing in the fall, or felt the summer raindrops against my face? How long has it been that I looked into a child's eyes, or listened to the slow, steady breathing of my spouse as he lays beside me in the night? How long has it been since I've gotten asway from the city lights & looked up into the night sky to count the stars? How long has it been since I've taken a roadtrip thru the mountains & breathed the crisp mountain air?

What about His love letter to me? How long has it been since I've read it & taken it to heart? How long has it been since I've thanked a friend for their care & kindness? How long has it been since I've really cherished my children? How long has it been since I rejoiced over the empty tomb, or was honored to witness a loved one's wedding vows? How long has it been since I felt real peace that I can't even describe, or shed tears with a friend? How long has it been since I've rolled on the floor in laughtor with a 2-year old? How long has it been that I've suffered a heartfelt loss & realized how deeply I can love?

How long has it been since I've appreciated the creativity of the Creator or witnessed another giving their life to God? How long has it been since I've appreciated the courage of another? How long has it been since I've taken a long look at the cross & tasted the sorrow & love displayed there? How long has it been since I took the time to count the birds at the feeder, or examined the billowing clouds just before a thunderstorm?

How long has it been since I've seen God? Well, that's too long! He's in it all! "All in All, Beginning & End, I AM."

Everyday, every life!

Blessings!

Mercy Me!

One thing I know for certain is that the Word of God never grows old. It's relevant on every level to every person for all generations. God created & designed me, so it makes sense that He knows me thru & thru & knows what will give me joy & what will bring heartache. He's always working for me & hoping with all His heart, I will choose Him!

There's a story Jesus tells in Luke (one of the gospels in the New Testament) about the separation of a father & son. We call it, "The Prodigal Son". One of a man's sons demands his future inheritance from his father & goes far from home spending his money in destructive ways. Once the money is gone, so are the "friends". He has no choice but to return to his father & beg to be taken in as a servant or he'll die.

One of the most beautiful scenes Jesus described in this story is that the father is standing on the porch hoping, with all his might, that his son would return home. He stood on that porch & watched for his son everyday just hoping that would be the one! He would not give up on him- ever! The day finally comes & he sees his son on the horizon making the long trip home. Jesus tells us the fahter starts running toward his son. He can't wait, he just cannot wait to hold & kiss his child! He cannot help but open his arms wide & is compelled to hold him in the biggest bear hug ever invented! Will he take him back as a servant into his household? NO! He will ONLY take him back as a son, his rightful place as a full member of the family!

After the father hugs, kisses & gives him a family ring, he throws his son a party! He leaves no detail undone, because this party is all out! The best calf he has, that's been fattened just for partying, is prepared in honor of his son. He invites all family & friends to this reunion because they HAVE to share in this kind of joy! Don't be mistaken, this was a party! Music, dancing & shouting! Tears of joy were shared by loved ones at this party, as well as high pitched shouts of joy when each person laid eyes on him for the first time in a long time! The dad held nothing back! No expense was spared! His son had been lost & away from him & now was back! He's where he belonged! He's home!

Jesus tells us the older brother was not much in the partying mood, though. He was jealous & angry that his dad would make such a big deal over his brother coming home when he'd been the faithful one all along. He'd been working all these years on the family land & really didn't believe his younger brother deserved to share in this family status, anymore. Wow! Family dynamics can be a kick in the pants, right? Complicated, for sure!

The most beautiful part of this story is that of mercy. The dad was compelled to extend mercy at the same time he extended those open arms to his boy! Mercy was the theme of the day! Mercy says that status into the family is sure. It's forever. Mercy makes no sense- that's why it's mercy! That's why it's NOT "the third degree". That's why it's NOT "earning" back one's place! Mercy is NOT "pointing the finger." It's MERCY!

The oldest brother got his dad's mercy, too! He didn't lose the love of this man. He didn't lose his family. He needed mercy to understand it all & that's what he got. It's not anything either of these boys deserved! It's not anything I deserve! But, it's sweet! It's MERCY!

Yes, mercy is not what I'm owed, but it's what I WANT! It's what I NEED! It's the ONLY way for me to be in the Family! My sweet, sweet Father has extended His open arms & covered me in mercy! What a story Jesus told! What a picture He's painted for me to see!

Jesus, thank you for telling this story! Thank you that the dad in this story reflects my Dad in heaven! Thank you, that You always greet me with open arms! Thank you, for the party You constantly throw for me! Thank you, thank you, thank you for MERCY!

*Special thanks to Rick A for your teaching & focus on God's Word! Special thanks for "The Good, The Bad & The Ugly".

Blessings!

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

It will be a great day when cancer is a thing of the past! October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month & the pink ribbons are all around! So thankful for the research & study going on to get rid of this terrible disease! I've learned this year that the many kinds of cancer are all represented by particular colors. Peach for Uterine Cancer, pink for Breast Cancer, teal for Ovarian Cancer, dark blue for Colon Cancer, white for Lung Cancer, black for Skin Cancer, lavender for All Cancers & turquiose for Lymphedema Awareness.

I pray no one else gets cancer. I pray cancer is only read about in history books by my grandsons. I pray families can go their whole lives & not endure this disease. But, most of all I pray that anyone & everyone that is effected by any kind of cancer runs to Jesus thru it all! I pray women who hear the words, "You have breast cancer" won't even consider facing it alone! I pray families will completely lean on Jesus as they care for loved ones with cancer. I pray Jesus is the answer for each precious person. That's why He came to earth. To be the answer. He died & was raised from the dead for me & every person for all time. He's the answer in the midst of all the questions about cancer. He's my answer & my family's answer. Until cancer is gone for good & then beyond, Jesus will always be the only answer.

Blessings!

Quick Update

I've not posted in a couple of weeks, not because I have nothing on my heart, but because I have so much! There's so much on my mind & heart & God has been so busy with me! Teaching me, growing me, protecting me... I'm going to post some things soon- when it slows down to a mild spin in my head!
I'm doing really well considering everything my body has been through. I'm so thankful & my family is so thankful for all the blessings of 2009.
I'm going to continue journaling this journey with it's ups & downs, and hopefully, God will be always be glorified. Simply, because He deserves it!
Blessings!