Anticipation!

Anticipating with joy this new season of life... retirement. After lots of prayer, Mike & I agreed it is time for me to quit working full-time outside our home.

I'm so thankful for the work God has provided for me these many years & pray His direction in this next phase of life.

I have wanted & want now, what God wants me to do. I know that's included the jobs He's given me through the years to help provide for a growing family.

Now, a simpler calendar is what He's calling me to. Can't think of a time- not one season- that God hasn't been good to me! That's why I look to this one with anticipation of His plans for me!

Blessings!

Memorial Day

Thank-you to ALL who have served and who are serving this country! The true extent of your sacrifice may never be realized or recognized, but I thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping make the USA the greatest country on earth! You are heros to me & I will live in appreciation for you!

I especially remember & thank a very special group of Marines today!

Blessings!

"Nothing I Desire Compares to You!"

Praises! Praises! Bone scan is clean! Thankful! Humbled! Blessed! Thank you, Sweet Lord!

CT scan this morning was for my liver. Haven't gotten the result, yet, but have confidence in the mercy of Jesus! He gets praises before, during & after answers! Praise doesn't hinge on answers... praise relies soley on I AM! So, praises!

CT & bone scans don't physically hurt at all. They're just huge x-ray machines, but there are steps needed to be taken for these machines & Techs to do their jobs. First step is to drink a container of Barium. Now, not to brag, but I'm a world class Barium chugger. I can get that stuff down like nobody' s business! (Not sure how we can send people to the moon, but not get this process a bit easier, but, oh well!) If you ever need a Barium cheerleader in your corner, just call on me!

OK, Step 1, Barium down. Step 2 IV (easy enough), then, lay still, follow directions on breathing & pictues taken. Step 3 Iodine injection into IV to "light up" for the next pictures. This doesn't hurt but is the weirdest sensation! Within seconds of the injection, an extremely warm sensation starts at the top of your head & imediately heads down your body. It can be felt as it travels through the veins & it's just crazy! This allows a few more pictures to be taken. That's it. CT done.

Before removal of the IV, another Tech injects Contrast in preparation for the bone scan. Doesn't hurt but tastes like metal for a few seconds. This REALLY "lights you up" (enough to actualy set an airport security system off!) Crazy! This must stay in one's system for 3 hours before the scan can be done. Hospital staff sends you to breakfast to eat & drink before returning for bone scan.

The bone scan takes about a half hour of laying very still & relaxed. Doesn't hurt at all & I find is a great time for good conversation with the Lord. I've shared before that I ask the Spirit to give me a praise song in that machine. I know hundreds of praise songs, but want Him to choose it for me, so I go in with an open mind & do my best to listen to what He wants from me.

Today, there were 2 songs coming to mind over & over that I sang to Him.
"Lord, you are more precious than silver. Lord, you are more costly than gold. Lord, you are more beautiful than diamonds, & nothing I desire compares with You!" & "You are my strength when I am weak, you are the treasure that I seek, You are my All in All!"

I've sung these songs for years, & can't really say either is a particular favorite over other songs, but that's the word today, so, I sang! As I sang, I began to think of things I desire, things I want in life... to be clean of cancer, live many more years with Mike & my children. Have many more years with my grandchildren & watch them grow. See the church mature & prosper, enjoy friendships, work in ministry, go & see & do, etc, etc. (I actually have a lengthy list of "wants".) Then, repeated the verses again & again. "NOTHING I desire compares to You!" & "You are the Treasure that I seek." I wrestled in my spirit to see if I really meant these words... is there ANYTHING or ANYONE that compares to You? Is being free of cancer even in the same ballpark as knowing & living in You? Can my marriage, children or grandchildren share the same level of comparison as my salvation in You? So many of the things I want are good things... but, I have to say, not one of these desires compares to the love, mercy & saving grace given me by Jesus Christ. Nothing compares to Him. No one is His equal.

So, today, the CT & bone scans served as conduits for praise time to my gracious Father. X-ray machines were quiet respites for prayer & He sent His word to me- that NOTHING compares to Jesus. With the peace that comes from Him, He confirmed - again- that He's got me. That no matter the answers, no matter the circumstance or events, He cannot be compared to anything I know, love or want in this life.

I thank you, Father, for Your answer today in granting me a clean bone scan! You're my strength since I'm weak & I really thank You, because I want this so very, very much! I believe with all my heart, even this desire doesn't compare to Your glory! So, today, I walk away from the bone scan still believing that keeping You as my #1 desire is paramount in my life. All the other blessings & desires of life are incredible, gracious gifts from You. I thank you for those gifts- I cherish them- but I don't compare them.

You are the Tresure that I seek.

Blessings!

Deut 31:8 It's a "God-thing"

"The Lord himself will go before you & be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged." (NIV)

A popular saying these days in response to an event in life that's attributed to the spiritual & has nothing to do with coincendence, is "it's a God-thing." Believers know exactly what this means. It's a statement that gives credit where credit is due- to the workings of Almighty God & takes chance completely out of the picture.

The more I believe & the more I witness, the more I'm certain it's ALL a God-thing! He's working at every turn to express His love. He's forever blessing (both in His giving & taking) & longs for close & eternal relationships. He reveals His character & promises His constant presence. Tells us not to be afraid or discouraged. Explains that He goes before us & is in this life's journey with us all the way! Knowing & believing this makes living life a different story! Imagine this!

He has done- again- what He's promised for us! I'm healing from surgery & am overwhelmed by the grace covering me! Incredible, really! Injections for reconstruction began today & will go 6 weeks, for now. The Plastic surgeon will oversee this phase & set our course for the next weeks/months ahead.

The CT & Bone scans with the Oncologist are set for the first half of May. So, if you're not tired of praying for us, please pray God keeps me clear of any reoccuring cancer! I'm thankful to be the daughter of The King since His mercies are new every morning & He NEVER will leave or forsake me! (read above scripture again!)

So, with ALL this that's still happening, I'm NOT afraid or discouraged! How can I be?? God has been & is rock-hard faithful! You have stood by me & for me, too! I simply cannot face any procedure or challenge with fear or discouragement!

Go before me, Lord, go before me & I will meet You there because it's ALL a God-thing!

Blessings!

Day 12 Post-Surgery Update

Wow! So thankful for each day's healing post-surgery! This is no joke of a surgery & completely remarkable that medical minds have even been able to think it through & accomplish such things!

Had 1 post-op appointment with breast surgeon this week, now today, another appointment with plastic surgeon. My body is tracking on the appropriate timeframe, so again, that's another praise. (I can understand now why they've allotted 6 weeks to thoroughly heal!)

I've had a couple of teary times lately, (would be lieing if I told you this was easy) but count that as normal for all we're dealing with. Then, within a little while, gain prespective, & get ready to face the next step in this journey.

Really, I don't know what I'd do without Mike & his unending love, support, patience & strength. Have no doubt that husbands go through breast cancer, too. And, his commitment to the Lord & to me cannot be described in a brief blog.

Thank you for continued prayer, love & support expressed daily. We've an amazing support group who's actions can only be attributed to the love had for Jesus. Then, that love just spills over onto us. We thank you!

Blessings!

Easter 2010

Got to spend some fun time with Cason & Braden Easter evening. Really, could they be any cuter? Thank you, Lord, for the boys!

Quick Note

Thank-you, Lord! I'm feeling WAY better than anticipated at this point & am bouncing off the walls with PRAISE! Still look like a road-map & got word from Pathology report that there were some pre-cancerous cells (NOT cancer) in the tissue removed in surgery. The surgeon got it all, so there's another praise! I also have a bunch of healing to do, but for what my body has been through, I'm just so thankful! :)
Never-ending thanks to those of you who are still praying! Please don't think for a second that what you're doing is not VITAL for my recovery & healing! Praying to & PRAISING the Great Physician is the most important work of Believers & Mike & I thank God for you & pray blessings on you & your families!

Blessings!

MAC Truck!

I've never actually been hit by a MAC truck racing down the road at 90 mph but I think this surgery could probably be compared to it! LOL! Wow! Amazing! Really, can you imagine people understanding this kind of thing & working to better another's life? So thankful God's provided some medical minds with such abilities!

I'm doing well, but not running any races right now. I tolerate all the pain meds & antibitotics very well, & am thankful. Also, am following Doctor's orders by breathing deeply & walking around the house several times a day, eating well (no nausea!) & resting! Can't pick up anything at all with my arms but have good, strong legs & Mike to help me in & out of bed. (Please, make certain Mike is in every prayer you speak for us!) Recovery runs about 6 weeks, & I'll be seeing doctors all along the way. Will post again soon.

Continuing to be amazed at the love & support of family & friends. Content & at peace with this journey. Choosing to worship our living God!

Blessings!

Running the Race

This breast-cancer marathon isn't the 26.2 miles one runs on a Saturday. It's not got a well-defined Start & Finish line & time to prepare, but it does have some things in common to an amazing feat like that.

Both kinds of marathons aren't limited to the physical, but demand mental, emotional & spiritual stamina, too. They require a huge support team & a host of crew members for preparation & safety of the runners. Marathon runners are assigned numbers, monitored closely & require knowledgeable people of their physical & mental needs during the run. Every detail is covered, even down to the shoes best suited for that particular athelete.

I know people who are not afraid of running marathons. Not intimidated by the distance. Not side-lined when the race gets hard. There are loved ones & strangers who've run the breast-cancer marathon with us & faithfully prayed for my family & me for over a year through this particular run! That's really an amazing thing to think about & that kind of commitment & love will forever be engraved on our hearts!

You are the people we call on- again. Keep praying our family through this upcoming surgery. Keep praying God protect my body from any return of cancer. Keep praying we keep focused on Jesus everyday & do not go even a moment without Him!

Thank you, dear friends! Thank you for running the race with us & believing in a strong finish! We serve a sweet & powerful Lord who supplies every single detail we need in the race. Makes running it worth every step! Makes seeing it through even that much sweeter! Makes the prize at the end priceless!

Blessings!

What an Easter!

Easter Sunday was yesterday. Absolutley beautiful weather & another day to be most thankful for Jesus. Imagine! The Son of God leaving heaven, living here & being killed by the very people He came to save! Then, raising from the dead 3 days later! All this to create -for all mankind -a way back to God! All that for you & me. Amazing love, amazing actions!

Forces me to think about a lot of things in life. Demands me face my sin & His saving. Makes me thankful, from my core, that I will be in heaven forever! It's Easter!

Jesus loves me & He sees the big picture for me for all time.
Jesus forgives me & knows I'm lost without His grace!
Jesus changes me & doesn't let my sin stop Him from moving me to a deeper place with Him.

Jesus saves me & paid my debt with His own life!

Wow! What a Savior! What an Easter!
Blessings!

Happy 3rd Birthday Cason!

Happy Birthday, Cason! You're the greatest 3 year old, ever! Have a happy, happy day!

Happy 30th Birthday Eric!

Happy 30th Birthday Eric! Hope you had the greastest day! Welcome to the 30's!!!

Happy Birthdays!

Happy, Happy Birthdays to Randi & Tyrel! Love you both so much!

Wow! A Year!

Today marks a year since the surgeon confirmed "breast cancer." Wow! My head still spins just thinking about it. Spins even more when I think about all God has done through it! He has been faithful & He remains soverign.
Not every answer He gave was what we wanted. We prayed while we waited for biopsy results, that the tumor be benign... and it wasn't. He could have made it so, but He didn't.
Every answer He did give, though, was merciful. The times He said, "No," His strength carried us. The times He said, "Trust Me," His peace covered us & the times He said, "Not now," His patience sustained us.
Then God said, "YES!" to cancer dieing & it was resounding! His voice shook us to our core & displayed His mercy & power!
This year has been like none other for us, but Mike & I will say together, that everyday of it was blessed. Everyday of it, God showed Himself true. Everyday of it proved there's no greater community in the world than that of believers & everyday of it there was peace the world can't possibly understand.
Yes, today marks a year in the life of one lady with breast cancer. But, it's also a year in the life of my physical family who's faithfully walked the road with me & a year in the life of a spiritual family that's living out the love of Jesus towards me.
Wow! A year! That's what a year in the life of our Lord looks like!
Blessings!

The Pink Hat

Walking into any surgeon's waiting room can be a daunting experience. People from all walks of life, all ages, races, religions & backgrounds are waiting on some sort of intimate news that will effect their bodies & lives. They're waiting & hoping for some sort of answer, direction or fix. They're making plans or have had their plans interrupted. They're very possibly scared or tired or sick. In a plastic surgeon's office, you've even got people who are happy! They're going to get a nicer nose, tummy tuck, scars repaired or a new set of breasts. They're looking forward to the miracle the surgeon is going to perform on them & they wait with anticipation of how beautiful they'll be if they can just get a surgery done.

The plastic's waiting room that afternoon was full. Mike & I took the last 2 separate seats in the room. There was a mixture of people who had never seen one another prior to this appointment, nor probably ever would again. A unique group of strangers thrown all together in one room- a plastic surgeon's waiting room in downtown Ft. Worth, Texas.

I couldn't help but notice right away, a couple in their mid- 40's, a bit rough around the edges & smelling of cigarette smoke, sitting quietly, holding hands. I took the single seat next to the husband. She was obviously in or just out of chemo treatments for she was bald with a soft & fuzzy, pink hat covering her bare skin. The hat had several pink ribbon pins attached, signifying breast cancer awareness & she sat quietly without a smile. I could read it all over her sweet face- she was tired. She was tired of being sick from chemo. She was tired of doctor appointments, treatments & losing herself to cancer. Her appointment today would probably include a discussion she never envisioned herself having with anyone. That of reconstructing her breasts after mastectomies. This, of course, was a presumption on my part, but in my heart, I knew I had assessed this one correctly.

All I said was, "I like your hat." That's all it took. That's all that was needed to open up the hearts of everyone in that waiting room! The emotions, thoughts, fears & feelings of the people in that room came barreling out to one another. You couldn't get the room quiet after that simple acknowledgement! It was like we were long, lost friends & I believe, it was a God appointed time.

I learned, on this day, the young black man was meeting with the surgeon to have a tattoo removed from his throat in hopes of joining the Navy. His future depended on the answer from this "miracle-doctor". His father waited with him for encouragement & hope for his son.

A middle-aged black woman, heavy set & walking with a cane was eager to ask the 40's something, white lady in the pink hat about her cancer. She & her young adult daughter wanted to offer encouragment & were ready to do just that when the "quiet" was broken in the room. After I asked the lady in the pink hat if she was walking this journey with the Lord, and she responded that she was, the two ladies on the other side of this small waiting room, jumped at the opportunity to encourage her & remind her God was with her!

Then, the father waiting for his son, asked the lady in the pink hat if he could put her on his church's prayer list. He wanted his group to pray for her. He shared with everyone in the room that he'd seen an ad that morning on tv about breast cancer & women dressed in pink. He said he knew he was to look for a "pink" lady that day & God had put her in his path to pray for her. God was praised that day, in that room, by the response of His children to one another. (This man didn't ask about praying for me, & it didn't offend me at all. I thanked God because that man didn't even realize I had been sick! Bringing me this far- that alone is worthy of praise!)

Make no mistake about breast surgery. There are augmentations & there are reconstructions. The two are not the same! The women waiting on their appointments with a plastics surgeon have all together different demeanors, depending on which surgery they seek. One is getting a set of beautiful, perky new breasts & the other is going to endure surgery & painful injections to rebuild what cancer has so mercilessly ripped apart.

No matter the reason we're in the waiting room, we all need the Lord. Some are patients, some are supporters, & all are in need. In the happy times, sad times, painful times, joyful times, quiet times & times in the doctor's waiting rooms, we're simply in need of Him. We're all in need of prayer. We're all in need of encouragement. We're all needing kind words & support. We may overlook it at first, but we're all wearing a pink hat.

Blessings!